Parents, Teachers Remind Students Of Appropriate Social Media Use

The arrest of a student over threatening messages posted on his Twitter account has caused Stonington residents to rethink how social media is used.

Stonington parents and teachers are talking to students about appropriate social media, discussing how to monitor teenagers online and questioning why no one came forward sooner.

A Saturday, with breach of peace for messages posted on Twitter some of which included the phrase, “#letsblowupSHS.”

On Monday, March 26, Stonington High School administrators asked teachers to read the following message to students:

“Dr. Murphy and Mr. Friese learned Friday that an inappropriate social media post dated 3 weeks ago by a SHS student warranted investigation by the Stonington Police department. The police and school administration have taken appropriate measures to ensure your safety. No danger to you or staff exists.

Think before you send a text or email or post anything on a social network site. You are responsible for all inappropriate comments you make. There are consequences for your actions.”

While the schools have focused on putting responsibility in the hands of students by making them aware of consequences and when they or another student are in need, community members are worrying and wondering about how many and did not say anything.

Initial reports from the police suggested many students followed the student on Twitter. It appears as if the student’s Twitter account has since been deleted, and just how many students saw the posts over the course of three weeks is unclear.

Many Stonington parents, however, say they don’t relay on others to monitor their children’s social media actions and are using the incident of a way to remind their teenagers of appropriate social media use.

“I made it very clear to my teenagers they should have zero expectation of "privacy" in our house, and they respect that,” said Mystic parent Sarah Myers on Facebook. “I explained to them in this digital age not everyone can be who they seem and it's my job to make sure they are safe. That being said, I do check their cell phones, email and Facebook accounts from time to time. We discuss what is appropriate and what is not appropriate.”

It may be easier to monitor younger teenagers’ online behavior. As they get older parents said they try to find a balance between monitoring them and trusting them, but that trust is earned.

“It is my husband and my responsibility to monitor his interactions, just like we are aware and involved with his activities and his friends—one is electronic and one is in person,” Janina Goldberg said on Facebook. “It has been required that we are his Facebook friends and we know his passwords. We too have checked from time to time and didn't find issues so we check less often now. But just because they are older, doesn't mean there aren't still situations that parents need to know about and discuss. Granted, we won't be there for every interaction/post but we do have a general sense of his thoughts and behavior and values. Guidance, communication and support help give our kids the best chance in making the right/safest decisions.”

While parents focused on how to monitor their children at home some also . Over the past few months there have been several incidents within the schools and decisions made that have had parents asking for. As the news of the police investigation of the tweets emerged parents again asked for more details.

Superintendent tried to address those concerns on her blog Tuesday afternoon saying that she wants families to learn about school events from the schools first but that it also the schools’ job to protect student privacy.

“It is our hope that by broadcasting messages using the AlertNow system that parents will view this as a commitment on our part to share what we believe parents need to know about the events in our schools in a timely manner,” said Masterjoseph in her blog post. “When statements are brief, it is not because we wish to remain vague. Should we have information that leads us to be concerned about safety for students, we will be clear and forthright and will take any and all necessary steps to protect them, including direct communication with parents.”